Ex-NRL star Kane Evans has confirmed he is gay and opened up about his battle with alcohol and drug addiction.
The former Roosters, Eels and Warriors forward explained why he was homeless earlier this year and the suicidal thoughts he has dealt with since he was a teenager.
In the emotional interview he revealed that he was in ‘denial’ from a young age about his sexuality.
And that was a big reason for his addictions, as he tried to ‘escape’ who he really was he claims.
Furthermore Evans revealed he was subject to blackmail over his sexuality throughout the years.
The 34-year-old last played for the Warriors in 2021 before making the switch to the Super League joining Hull FC.
Kane Evans has come out as gay and opened up about his struggles with addiction and suicidal thoughts
Evans is currently 130 days sober after leaving rehab
The 34-year-old also revealed he had been on the receiving end of blackmail attempts over his sexuality
‘I had three goals in life: to play NRL, to buy my parents a house, and then I wanted to top myself,’ Evans told James Bracey for Nine’s 100% Footy.
‘Because I was living in denial, from a young age I know that I’m gay but I went down every other avenue to build up these walls to be someone to escape who I am.
‘I still can’t believe I’m here talking to you, this is definitely my worst nightmare, but I know if I surrender, it’s the start to a new life.
‘I’ve been fighting a war within since I was about 15 years old, and it’s not sustainable.
‘I was sleeping in parks, doing drugs, trying to ultimately pass away so I didn’t have to come to this.
‘But I know there are people struggling with the same struggle I’ve gone through, so I’m very blessed that I can come here and talk to you and be able to save a life or two.
‘I’ve carried that around my whole life but I’m here today to show people you don’t have to live like that. Even now I feel more free just by saying it out loud. I’ve brought it to light.’
Speaking of the blackmail attempts, Evans told Bracey that it brought him ‘shame and fear and guilt’ in himself.
‘Now I’ve come and spoken about it, they’ve lost their power,’ he said.
‘Coming and just speaking today, fear shame and guilt, I’ve cut ties with all that, and I feel peace within, and I feel a weight has lifted off my shoulders.’
As he continued to struggle with addiction he was cut from his contract early by the Warriors, that saw him trade New Zealand for Hull.
But his patterns of abuse continued to worsen and he was eventually released six months early.
Upon his return to Australia, Evans attempted to open a cafe with a friend but his approach eventually saw him saddled with a $50,000 debt.
The cafe closed down and Evans was left sleeping rough.
‘I started going down a slippery slope. Started numbing myself with alcohol and drugs,’ he said.
‘Looking back now I realise there were deeper things I was masking, and I was just using every outlet I could until the point where I was couch-surfing and became homeless.’
That was when the RLPA’s past players and transition manager Joe Galuvao reached out to Evans.
‘He said ‘you know you deserve to live a good life? You deserve healing’,’ Evans recalled.
‘I sat there and thought about it: why do I deserve healing or a good life?
‘When he said that I started questioning maybe death isn’t in the plan for me yet, maybe I do deserve to get help. I thank God he came and visited me, he got me into rehab with the help of the RLPA.’
That conversation was the spark Evans needed to get his life back on track and he entered rehab while his former coach Trent Robinson reached out and told him the club had his back.
Shortly after leaving rehab, Robinson hosted Evans and his friends at Roosters headquarters and told him the club would pay for his mental health programs.
Evans is now 130 days sober.
If you or anyone you know needs immediate support, contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 or via lifeline.org.au. In an emergency, call 000.
