Adults caught in the middle of a perfect storm of soaring rent and house prices are finding themselves back living with parents years after they initially flew the nest.
The ‘boomerang generation’ – adults who moved out but returned home later – is expanding, and it is no longer just those in their early 20s who are back under their parents’ roofs.
But for many, the cheaper (or in some cases free) rent comes with uncomfortable trade-offs, as more than half of adults back at home lament rising tensions and a lack of independence, and hope to eventually move back out.
Despite earning £50,000 a year working in operations for Network Rail, Jon Painter, 40, had to move back home with his mother after an “expensive” divorce in 2020.
Earning £12,000 more than the UK average salary, his income looks strong on paper. It is roughly double what someone on the living wage would take home. But Mr Painter is left with just £200 a month after bills.
He now lives in his 74-year-old mother’s two-bedroom flat in Swindon, Wiltshire, 50 miles away from his former family home in Hereford, which he had to move out of.
After Mr Painter and his ex-partner divorced, he had to move out of the three-bedroom family home he bought with his former father-in-law two years prior.
He has a hefty £2,500 monthly bill to pay for child and ex-spousal support, and until August, he also had to pay £1,250 in mortgage payments and shared bills, a £350 car payment, a £200 phone bill, and £500 in loan payments.
He is left with around £50 a week, which he spends on food and petrol, but with such a modest sum available he is unable to save up for a house deposit or afford rental costs to move out of his mother’s house.
“It was very hard moving back in with my mum, it wasn’t something I’d ever think I’d have to do again,” Mr Painter said.
“I had to leave the family home I thought I’d be raising my children in.”
A poll of 2,000 adults who live with their parents, which was commissioned by Skipton Group as part of its Home Affordability Index, found that nine in ten people hoped to get out of their parents’ house.
But 82 per cent of those saving for a deposit said they still have a long way to go.
Less than 10 per cent of those adults were able to afford a home, and in London, the East of England, and the Southwest, the affordability shrinks to less than 1.5 per cent.
The average house price is more than five times higher than the average salary for 90 per cent of earners in England, according to recent data from the Office for National Statistics.
A third of those wanting to move out of their parents’ house admitted their income is too low or unpredictable to afford it.
Mr Painter has been living with his mother, a retired supermarket worker, for five years now, and says that unless he wins the lottery he will be living with her for years to come.
“On paper, you’d think I’d have lots of disposable income, but that’s totally not the case,” he said.
“I provide child support to our two young girls – something I will never stop doing because they are the absolute priority.
“Life is really expensive right now – especially for those with children.
“Of course it’s not ideal, I’m in my 40s and living with my mum, and I’m sure she’d much rather have her own space,” Mr Painter admitted. “But it’s the only option I have, and I’m grateful that my mum will have me.”
Half of those surveyed admitted to being frustrated with their living situation, and 36 per cent felt as if they had lost their independence.
“I feel for those who don’t have a parent or close one, they can move in with – or in my case, back in with.”
His mother, Christine, said it can be awkward managing two different lifestyles in the same household. “I only wish I could help somehow with getting him his own place, but unfortunately, things haven’t panned out that way”.
Research released by NatWest in May found that nearly a quarter of parents reported their children moving back home after moving out for the first time, with the average age of return being 26.
Kaiesha Page, who once lived alone in Cardiff, said her life has been put on hold since she returned home to support her family.
Ms Page moved back in with her mother and grandparents in Rhondda Valley, South Wales, just before the pandemic to take care of her 82-year-old grandad, Malcom, who has a lung condition and heart failure.
She earns up to £1.5k a month but struggles to put enough aside to move out as her salary goes towards her mother’s bills and her grandparents’ care. Her 60-year-old mother, Susan, is a part-time cleaner and is currently awaiting an autism diagnosis.
Since moving back home, Ms Page has had to put her career as a writer on hold to take flexible jobs which work around her family’s needs. She said she feels like her life has been stalled.
She is close with her family, but says it has restricted her from being able to socialise and date. “I wouldn’t dream of inviting friends around – my nan and grandad are very house proud,” she said, admitting: “It’s a little bit lonely at times”.
According to Skipton Group, 29 per cent of adults living at home found it difficult to maintain romantic and platonic relationships. While Ms Page hopes to live alone one day, she worries it wouldn’t be fair to her family.
“I’ve stayed for various different reasons – affordability and I’m single,” she said, admitting she also feels that she is needed at home.
She said it is difficult to be the one supporting her family. “I’ve never had access to support from parents and that has been difficult to save.”
Stacey Dickens from Skipton’s Home Affordability Index, said: “Aspiring first-time buyers would be forgiven for thinking of all the benefits of staying in the family home for longer when it comes to saving up to move out.
“For many, the experience of living with their parents as an adult also comes with unexpected compromises,” she said. “From needing to explain what time they’ll be home at night, negotiating shopping and cooking arrangements, bathroom etiquette, even navigating how best to date and develop relationships. It can be awkward for everyone.”
Moving back into the family home is a lifeline for many people, Ms Dickens said. “Young adults aren’t failing to ‘make the most’ of the situation; they’re caught in a system where even the most disciplined saving, combined with generous parental support, still doesn’t open the door for them to home ownership.”
