‘I asked for Angela – they had no idea what I was talking about’ | UK News

During a night out in London to celebrate a friend’s birthday, Annie went to a bar that ran the Ask for Angela safety scheme. When she ended up needing to evade the attentions of a man she’d met there, she hoped that asking for Angela would offer a “discreet and easy” escape route.

Here, in her own words, she explains how this proved not to be the case.

“It was like any other birthday night out.

“The plan had been to go out, have a few drinks and have a dance – we love that kind of night,” says Annie, a 32-year-old lawyer.

“Everyone was just having a really good time, dancing away. I stepped out for a cigarette and I met this guy outside.

“He was wearing this white leather jacket and just seemed really, really fun. He said how nice my dress was.”

Annie is speaking out in the wake of secret filming by the that found 13 of the 25 venues visited by reporters failed to respond appropriately to the Angela code word – which is supposed to indicate to bar staff that a customer is in need of help.

Research by the since that report has found more than 30 councils now expect or demand that venues run Ask for Angela when deciding liquor licence applications, and a further 67 local authorities confirmed they were either already looking to follow suit or would consider doing so in their next licensing policy review.

“He seemed a really fun and harmless guy and I had had a few drinks by this point so I was a bit more chatty and confident than I would otherwise have been,” says Annie, who is originally from Edinburgh but now lives in London.

“We swapped numbers and kind of said, ‘oh, we’ll have a dance inside together at some point’.

“About 30 mins to an hour later I got a message [from him] asking where I was.

“I went downstairs to have a bit of a dance. Then he got a bit ‘handsy’ and a bit too close.”

• The Ask for Angela initiative, a scheme in place at thousands of venues nationwide, aims to provide a discreet lifeline for people who believe they are in danger
• Those with such fears are advised to use the code word “Angela”, to indicate to staff they need help
• When a person mentions Angela to a staff member, they should immediately be taken to safety at a designated space inside the venue by a staff member and asked what support they need

Source: Ask for Angela

“I tried to slink away and he was reeling me back,” Annie says. “I wasn’t giving him any signals – I was like, ‘no, I’m not enjoying this’… I made it very clear that I was not interested. It was fight or flight in a very busy club.

“And when I got away he followed me. I felt a little bit threatened and a little bit vulnerable.”

She adds: “I’d seen Ask for Angela posters in so many bars.

“I went into the toilet, saw the poster, and thought: ‘Ah, there’s an opportunity to get myself clear of the situation.’

“One thing I would say is that the poster does not tell you what to say exactly. Everyone knows to Ask for Angela but how you actually do it is not clear.

“I felt hopeful – I’ve got a discreet, easy way to extricate myself from this situation.”

“When I went to the bar, the guy appeared again and tried to order us both a drink.

“But while he was talking to the other bartender I said to a male bartender, who was in his early 20s: ‘Is Angela there?’

“It was loud, but he looked at me totally puzzled. I don’t know if he heard what I said. So I said it again: ‘Is Angela there?’

“He just shrugged his shoulders and shook his head.

“The guy was still next to me but distracted enough – and I said: ‘Please can you get me away from this guy? I’m feeling uncomfortable.’

“The bartender shouted to the guy I was trying to get away from to get his payment, or to ask what he wanted, and I was able to slip off and get back upstairs.

“It was embarrassing because I’d just been yelling ‘Angela’ in this man’s face and he didn’t know what was talking about.

“I was a bit angry because although I came out of the situation unscathed, it could have been very different.

“The expectation is that it’s an easy, safe way to get yourself out of an unsafe situation – and it absolutely wasn’t.

“It was a disaster.

“I ended up having to explain myself, potentially putting myself in further danger in a busy bar.

“I mean I didn’t know anything about this man and I didn’t know if he was dangerous or would take offence at me trying to get away.”

Sylvia Oates, chief executive of Ask for Angela, says Angela should be “shorthand for asking for help” and that the person using the word should be quickly taken to safety.

She says while she was disappointed to hear of Annie’s experience, efforts to implement and improve the scheme are ongoing across the country.

Each year, hundreds of people successfully use Ask for Angela, Ms Oates says.

“We want to make sure the scheme is being run effectively and to make sure people can have confidence in it.”

As for Annie, she managed to get away from the man and rejoin her friends.

She has no idea what happened to him inside the venue after their encounter.

He did, though, message her the next day, she says.

“He said he had enjoyed dancing with me and asked where I had disappeared to.

“I immediately blocked him.”

A list of organisations in the UK offering support and information with some of the issues in this story is available at Action Line