Graham Thorpe’s son Henry has revealed how former England manager Gareth Southgate helped him following his father’s suicide.
Legendary England batsman Thorpe took his own life in August 2024, aged 55. He is survived by his second wife Amanda, whom he married in 2007, and four children, Henry, Amelia, Kitty and Emma. He separated from first wife Nicola in 2001.
His death came two-and-a-half years after being sacked as England assistant coach – which, at the inquest, coroner Jonathan Stevens determined ‘had a devastating effect on him’ as he ‘had lost his cricket family’.
Thorpe’s dismissal came off the back of a disastrous Ashes tour in Australia, where England lost the Covid-affected series 4-0.
In an interview with the Telegraph, Thorpe’s son Henry said he had been in the dark about what had happened to his father until about six months after his death, admitting he ‘spiralled’ and ‘was in a really dark place’ afterwards.
He revealed he left his job at M&C Saatchi Merlin, which was founded and chaired by Richard Thompson, the current chairman ECB, after his father’s death.
Legendary England batsman Graham Thorpe took his own life at the age of 55 back in 2024
His son Henry has spoken of how Gareth Southgate, bottom right, helped him after messaging the former England boss after seeing him at an England Test match last summer
Henry quit his job at M&C Saatchi Merlin after his father’s death and is now working in cricket coaching
Henry praised the support of Thompson and his after-care following his father’s suicide, which he admitted had inspired him to pursue a series of cricket coaching roles and businesses.
He also has involvement in the Thorpey’s Bat and Chat project, a wellbeing programme involving cricket sessions at the Oval, which is followed by chats about mental health.
Henry added that former England boss Southgate had been an influential figure, praising him for taking the time to reply to a message on LinkedIn to offer both advice and contacts to help him.
‘Gareth was at my dad’s day at the Oval last summer. I wasn’t having a great day, to be honest, it was a really tough day. I really wanted to talk to him but it just wasn’t right. I was on edge,’ Henry told the Telegraph.
‘I sent him a message on LinkedIn a couple of months later, not expecting him to ever see it. He wrote me an email of about 500 words.
‘He was so kind in sharing his number and linking me up with other people that I’ve connected with since. From a leadership and a transformational culture perspective, he is a genuine hero of mine.’
Henry admitted that his relationship with his father had been ‘fractured’ at times, due to the divorce of his parents.
Thorpe’s work within cricket and move to Australia with his second wife Amanda meant the pair lacked a ‘consistent relationship’, Henry added.
Henry Thorpe admitted he had a ‘fractured’ releationship with his father before reconnecting in 2019, and added he feels ‘genuine pride’ at his accomplishments
Thorpe with baby Henry and his first wife Nicola, after returning from a tour of New Zealand which he left for just a week after Henry’s birth
Henry revealed they had reconnected during his gap year in 2019 and reflected on a golden period in their relationship prior to the 2021-22 Ashes.
‘We had a conversation. I said: “I’m a young man now and I need to understand different perspectives.” I also need to be better at information gathering. And take more accountability for my own life, my own relationships. So that’s what kicked it all off positively,’ Henry said.
‘For a whole 12 months before he got unwell, me and Dad would walk his dog in Esher Woods and talk about batting. It was brilliant, and then he went on that tour to Australia.’
He added: ‘No one ever prepares you for death, no one ever prepares you for your dad to die. No one ever prepares you for a suicide death. No one ever prepares you for your dad to be Graham Thorpe and to die like that. You could sit and talk about it for hours.
‘At different phases of your life you wish you had done it all differently. All these feelings that it can create within you; anger, resentment and sadness. Also just genuine pride that my dad was who he was.’
Prior to the Ashes tour, Thorpe had been undergoing health treatment for 18 months, while the ECB provided 10 online counselling sessions after he was sacked.
In May 2022, three months after being sacked, Thorpe tried to take his own life with his brain injuries leaving him in intensive care for a fortnight.
Last year, his wife Amanda had been damning in her assessment of those ECB counselling sessions – stating that they asked for more help but it never arrived.
‘As he went through these sessions, it was clear that he wasn’t coping. He was getting worse,’ she told talkSPORT.
Thorpe with his wife Amanda, children Kitty, then three, and Emma, then 20 months old, at his MBE investiture at Buckingham Palace in London on July 12, 2007
‘We really did ask for help. I knew he needed more help than that. And it wasn’t forthcoming.’
Thorpe was offered a potential role within the England department later in 2022, but it was too late, Amanda added.
‘It was too late, basically. After the crisis he was very ill. He nearly lost his life. He had a stroke. We don’t know how that affected his brain after that.
‘The ECB might say, well, we didn’t know how ill he was. Although the doctors he was under did know.
‘They then said, “Oh, but there’s confidentiality”. There’s got to be some connection (between the ECB and the doctors).’
An ECB spokesperson described Thorpe as ‘a deeply admired and much-loved person’, saying: ‘His loss has been felt deeply across the cricketing community and far beyond, and our thoughts and heartfelt sympathies remain with his wife Amanda, his children, and all those who loved him.
‘Graham’s passing is a heart-breaking reminder of the challenges many face with mental health. His death was examined by a coroner; the inquest was held earlier this year with full support from the ECB. We have met with Amanda to discuss her concerns and have been in regular contact with her and the wider family.’
If you have been affected by any of the issues in this story, help and support is available at https://www.samaritans.org/. Alternatively, call 116 123 for free at any time.
