Some years ago, I was in the supermarket with my young son. I turned around from the shelves expecting him to be standing next to me, but he was gone. I looked around, calling his name. In the minutes that followed, the floor sank beneath me, and my entire world collapsed. Thankfully, it wasn’t long before he reappeared from another aisle. He couldn’t understand why I hugged him so hard.
Many of us will relate to this feeling – those minutes when a child is missing or out of sight can feel like hours. This is my reference point, in a small way, to understand just some of the anguish many refugees live with every single day.
When conflict or disaster strikes, many people are forcibly separated from their children, husbands and wives. Others have to make impossible choices to go their separate ways for the sake of staying alive. Once they lose contact, it’s incredibly difficult to find each other again.
Helping people trace their missing relatives is one of the oldest services the Red Cross provides. We were proud to be reuniting families in the First World War, and we are proud to still be doing so today.
The government grants refugee status to people when they have been forced to flee their home and it is unsafe for them to return. Until Monday’s announcement, they could apply for family reunion under separate rules set up to recognise the unique circumstances of refugees, in comparison to other migrants. The process was far from easy – it was expensive, complicated and restrictive, but it offered protection, hope, and a way for families to rebuild their lives together.
Now, that safe, managed route to rejoin family members has been suspended, and a new system will be announced for the new year. With that will come more barriers, the impact of which could see children potentially separated from a parent for years, trapped in conflict or disaster zones. Families will face harsh choices over those years – either trying to survive during the long wait for safety, or potentially risking the alternative – making a dangerous journey to the UK in order to attempt to rejoin their family.
Further restrictions on family reunion could reduce the ability of refugees granted protection in this country to properly integrate into their communities. Parents who arrive in the UK tell us they cannot feel at peace until they know their children are safe.
At the British Red Cross, we play a part in helping a small number of those granted a visa by the Home Office to reach the UK safely. Almost three-quarters of those we support are children.
When the conflict in Sudan escalated, a nine-month-old baby was separated from both parents and left in the care of his elderly grandmother. Thousands of miles away, his mother endured a year of despair, often crying herself to sleep from heartbreak. With support from the British Red Cross, they were finally reunited with their son in time for his second birthday.
A teenager separated from his parents spent half a decade in limbo, until the Red Cross brought them back together. After the harrowing experience of separation, he said: “If you don’t have family, you don’t have anything.”
Stories like this are the reason we do what we do. We know that being with close family members is vital for people’s mental health and their ability to integrate into communities. Many people tell us they cannot begin to live again until they know their loved ones are safe.
Last year, we were able to help 288 families – just under 5 per cent of those who had been granted family reunion visas. A small part of the picture when you look at overall migration, but a life-changing moment for each individual.
On arrival, we helped them settle into work and school, improve their English language skills and begin to rebuild their lives after unthinkable trauma. These are some of the solutions we should be looking at scaling up to alleviate pressures on our local communities – not keeping families apart.
When families are together, we see them thrive. It’s vital that we protect this lifeline for those torn apart.
Alex Fraser is director of refugee services at the British Red Cross
