Teacher at £30,000-a-year boarding school struck off after declaring love to pupil – UK Times

A teacher at a more than £30,000 a year boarding school has been struck off after repeatedly declaring his love to a pupil.

Benjamin Phelps, 31, was banned from teaching indefinitely after a disciplinary panel found he committed serious misconduct by his relationship with a student at St Bede’s School, East Sussex, while working as a deputy boarding housemaster, tutor and performing arts technician at the senior school for students aged 13 to 18.

During their relationship, Mr Phelps texted the pupil inappropriately, they met up outside lessons, hugged and kissed on the cheek, and he requested they skip school to “eat in the car” together.

He was fired in April 2024 following an investigation and the Teaching Regulation Agency’s professional conduct panel struck him off on January 16 this year.

One WhatsApp message he sent said: “I hope you’ve had a good night, I’m falling asleep with my phone in my hand. I love you and wish you sweet dream!! Contact me about anything xxxxxx”.

Another said: “A hot feeling went through me, from front to back, I shook slightly (bit weird but true), then I had this warm glow and I can’t stop staring at it.

“I feel love, like pure love at a level I’m not sure I’ve felt before. This one feels special. (I’m so sorry for this but you want the truth) it properly turned me on.

“I just want to grab you and pick you up and have you wrapped around me. Also (less crass now!) I feel like there is not a single other thought in my brain, not one other than you.”

He also told the student: “Love you more every day. My heart fluttered every time you caught my eye x also, I love the hearts! Just ready them they’ll stay close to me xx”.

On one occasion, he wrote on a napkin: “Just to say.. I (heart symbol) with all my (heart symbol), xxxx, missed you today”.

Mr Phelps received a call from the pupil in October 2023 and their relationship became increasingly personal between November and January 2024, shown in messages sent on the school’s main system for digital communication.

These Google chat messages, scattered with kisses and emojis, included “you have such a beautiful mind though, it’s so pure and genuine, I’ve always said that”, “massive hugs on the pillow” and “maybe delete this chat too in case they look through your phone”.

The student disclosed a matter to him in November 2023 that should have prompted him to follow safeguarding procedures but he did not, the panel said.

He moved their correspondence to WhatsApp in January 2024, which was not a school-approved form of communication, and they spent more time together outside of lessons and exchanged photographs.

Their relationship “came to a head” when the student attempted to kiss Mr Phelps in February 2024, the panel said.

It was indicated that the teacher did not reciprocate the kiss and he then attempted to return their relationship to “a more professional footing”, it found.

However, he did not report the kiss and accepted to the tribunal that there had on occasion been kisses on the cheek.

References to hugs in their messages made it clear that “hugs had occurred between them”, the panel said.

During the hearing, Mr Phelps “conceded that with hindsight he had probably been flattered to receive the attention” and that some messages he sent “indicated that he had developed romantic feelings”.

The panel found “both individually and cumulatively the activities” amounted to “significant breaches of professional boundaries and demonstrated that by February 2024 the relationship between Mr Phelps and Pupil A had become personal and romanticised”.

An allegation that he pursued a “course of conduct akin to grooming” was not proved.

Mr Phelps can apply for the prohibition order to be set aside but not until January 2030, and he has a right of appeal at the High Court.