“There is a special place in hell for women who don’t help other women,” said Madeleine Albright, the first woman to serve as US secretary of state. It’s a quote I think about far too often, simply because of how many people it applies to. I didn’t expect Gwyneth Paltrow to be one of them.
In a new interview, the 52-year-old actor explained that she refused to work with an intimacy coordinator for her latest film, Marty Supreme, despite her filming many sex scenes for it with her co-star, Timothée Chalamet, 29. Speaking to Vanity Fair in a piece published on Tuesday, Paltrow said: “I mean, we have a lot of sex in this movie. There’s a lot – a lot.” When asked if she was put in “a lot of vulnerable positions with” Chalamet for the film, Paltrow replied: “Beyond.”
And yet, the actress was completely dismissive of intimacy coordinators, whose job it is to ensure that actors feel safe and protected during sex scenes. “There’s now something called an intimacy coordinator, which I did not know existed,” she told the magazine. “I was like: ‘Girl, I’m from the era where you get naked, you get in bed, the camera’s on.” Paltrow went on, explaining that she and Chalamet didn’t feel they needed to rely on the coordinator: “We said, ‘I think we’re good. You can step a little bit back.’”
The comments are shocking, not least because Paltrow was one of the key voices in the #MeToo movement that legitimised the need for intimacy coordinators in the first place. Her remarks reek of superiority, as if having an intimacy coordinator makes you a somehow weaker actor, and even if Paltrow didn’t want to use one herself, promoting that view is seriously damaging for younger actresses, who might feel pressured to follow suit and go without, potentially putting themselves in uncomfortable, or even dangerous, situations.
It’s the flippancy, too, that feels particularly damning. Sure, Paltrow might be happy to “get naked” and “get in bed” with the camera rolling without anyone employed to monitor her safety. But #MeToo happened for a reason. Have we forgotten that already? Has Paltrow?
It’s not the first time an actress has been dismissive of intimacy coordinators. Consider Mikey Madison, who was named Best Actress at the Oscars for her role in Sean Baker’s multi-award-winning film Anora, in which she plays a sex worker who marries the son of a Russian oligarch. “The filmmakers offered me, if I wanted, an intimacy coordinator,” the 25-year-old told Pamela Anderson as part of Variety’s “Actors on Actors” series. “[But] Mark Eydelshteyn, who plays Ivan, and I decided it would be best to just keep it small. My character is a sex worker, and I had seen Sean’s films and know his dedication to authenticity. I was ready for it. As an actress, I approached it as a job.”
Intimacy coordinators have been a lifeline for so many in the entertainment industry, providing support and structure to an area of filmmaking that was long neglected, often at the expense of young women. How have we suddenly got to a point where famous actresses are loudly dismissing their credibility? One where the narrative is shifting: intimacy coordinators are no longer helpful, they’re annoying? They’re creating inauthentic performances? They’re getting in the way? Seriously?
Madison is one thing. A part of me is willing to forgive her, given how green she is to the industry. With Paltrow, however, I can’t help but despair. Someone in her position holds so much weight when it comes to shaping industry standards and conversations. And as someone who has spoken about being exploited herself – she accused Harvey Weinstein of sexually harassing her when she was 22, something the disgraced producer has always denied – she should know better than to criticise a part of the industry designed to combat the very system of abuse she alleges to have been a victim of.
Albright would be disappointed – and frankly, so am I.
