More than 40,000 women and girls go missing every year because of violence in a “hidden crisis” that must be tackled now, a leading charity has warned.
Missing People said women and girls are then at extremely high risk of harm if they are missing, with an estimated 27,000 being victims of sexual assault, harassment or exploitation.
Campaigners also warn that the government’s strategy to halve violence against women and girls (VAWG) in a decade does not go far enough, after the plan to deal with this “national emergency” was finally unveiled this week. Charities had written to safeguarding minister Jess Phillips earlier this year, calling for the “strong links” between VAWG and missing to be recognised “as a means to prevent further harm” in the strategy.
As Missing People issued the urgent warning, women opened up about facing abuse that led to their disappearance, saying they are pushed to the point where it feels as if the only options are “either attack their abuser and end up in jail, stay and be the victim and probably die, or they can go missing”.
One woman, who remains anonymous for safety reasons, said her ex-husband was so coercively controlling that he dictated what she ate, drank and wore, how she styled her hair and made a cup of tea, and once even prevented her from medical treatment when she was unwell.
“I had been so annihilated as to who I was, I as a person didn’t exist anymore, I had no control over any aspect of my life,” she told The Independent. “I convinced myself that my children would be better off if I were dead, because what did I bring to them? I didn’t see that it was ever going to get better… it was just getting worse. And I did not know how to get out. I was so overwhelmed, I thought I had to get out.”
The woman said she not only went missing several times during that marriage, but also as a teenager, having suffered “extreme violence” including sexual violence. “I just couldn’t figure out how I was going to get out of this situation, so to me it was the most logical thing,” she said.
Especially during the period when she was a girl, the woman said she received little support. Decades later, many young people at risk of going missing still say there is no service designed to meet their needs.
Alongside Missing People, The Independent is raising money to launch a new national lifeline for missing young people. SafeCall, a free, round-the-clock service, aims to reach the more than 72,000 children who disappear in the UK every year, offering them support, safety and connection when they need it most.
Donate here or text SAFE to 70577 to give £10 to Missing People – enough for one child to get help.
Throwing her support behind the campaign, the woman called SafeCall “crucial, life-changing and life-saving”.
Reflecting on what the service will offer to girls in similar situations to her own when she was a teenager, she said: “[It will] give them hope, hope that there is a future, there is a way out, you will be relieved, and there are people who will support you – all the things I didn’t have.”
Missing People estimates that at least a third (34 per cent) of missing incidents for women and girls each year are linked to violence, with research showing that domestic abuse and other personal safety concerns, such as sexual violence and honour-based abuse, cause an estimated 22,000 women and 19,000 girls to go missing. The charity said the most common reason for women and girls to go missing is concerns about their own safety, while women aged 18 to 64 are the group at the highest risk of harm while missing.
Police have now pledged to the charity that they will update national policing guidance and officer training to highlight the links between missing and VAWG, and that going missing is a key touchpoint to identify, safeguard and support survivors. But Missing People claims that, currently, opportunities to safeguard victims are potentially being missed.
“I think it really is a hidden crisis,” Susannah Drury, director of policy and development at Missing People, told The Independent. Among the reasons she cited for the lack of awareness include insufficient investigation into what happened to people when they were missing after they have been found, and the difficulties women and girls face in disclosing these experiences, including mistrust of police and fear of repercussions from abusers.
Another woman told The Independent she was in an abusive relationship as a teenager, during which she was stalked, faced death threats, and endured emotional, physical, sexual, financial and digital abuse. She said she had wanted to go missing countless times “to try to escape my reality”, and feeling at a desperate loss of options, but the control she faced from her abuser was so overbearing that she did not manage to.
“They will push you to want to go missing and just disappear – there were so many times,” she said.
“But it was like I couldn’t physically because of how controlling, and if you tried to go missing, he’d probably think you’d gone missing with someone else, and then that fear and those threats would make you perhaps not go anywhere.
“But I wanted to go missing in my own mind. When you go missing, people see the physical action, but it’s actually been happening all along in their own mind – of not wanting to be seen, or not wanting to be part of this world… It was really, really difficult.”
Ms Drury called for the links between going missing and VAWG to be “recognised and responded to”. She said: “This is an issue on a huge scale, of women and girls coming to harm, and in some cases tragically losing their lives, linked to these kinds of violence. And we know that missing is so important as a sign of crisis, that something is seriously wrong, that the police and other agencies need to respond to.”
Damien Miller, national policing lead for missing people, said: “It is vital that investigating officers are professionally curious, do not make assumptions and are cognisant of potential hidden harms. We are committed to continuously improving and refreshing guidance and training to ensure investigators are well-equipped to deal with the complex situations with which they can be faced in order to safeguard those at risk or suffering.”
A Home Office spokesperson said: “Every missing person case deserves a swift and thorough response from all safeguarding agencies. We also recognise the link between going missing and vulnerability to violence against women and girls, which is why tackling VAWG remains central to our approach.”
Please donate now to The Independent and Missing People’s SafeCall campaign, which aims to raise £165,000 to create a free, nationwide service helping vulnerable children find safety and support.
For advice, support and options if you or someone you love goes missing, text or call the charity Missing People on 116 000. It’s free, confidential and non-judgemental. Or visit www.missingpeople.org.uk/get-help
If you are experiencing feelings of distress, or are struggling to cope, you can speak to the Samaritans, in confidence, on 116 123 (UK and ROI), email [email protected], or visit the Samaritans website to find details of your nearest branch. If you are based in the USA, and you or someone you know needs mental health assistance right now, call or text 988, or visit 988lifeline.org to access online chat from the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline. This is a free, confidential crisis hotline that is available to everyone 24 hours a day, seven days a week. If you are in another country, you can go to www.befrienders.org to find a helpline near you.
