Side by side on a sofa inside the National Comedy Center, Gail and Mario Cirasunda chuckled at a clip from the 1980s sitcom “Family Ties” that was playing on a TV screen. The show’s oldest daughter, Mallory, was introducing her unconventional artist boyfriend Nick to her bewildered television family.
“I think our daughter brought him home once. Maybe two of our daughters!” Gail said with a laugh over coffee and donuts later.
“Five daughters, two sons,” her husband Mario, 85, chimed in. “Sometimes I’d wonder,” he smiled, shaking his head at the memories of the couple’s own family antics over their 59-year marriage.
Moments like this are what brought the Cirasundas to the comedy museum in western New York and the memory cafe taking place inside. The monthly events invite people with Alzheimer’s, dementia, or other memory loss, and their caregivers, to spend time at the interactive museum. For visitors like Mario, who has dementia, and his wife, the scenes and artifacts from funny shows and comedians have a way of triggering shared laughs and connection, and, as comedy center staff have found, memories.
Gail, 78, treasures the moments when Mario — who still vividly recalls his childhood route to school and the names of old friends — also recollects experiences from their shared life. A 1965 blind date after Mario got out of the Navy led to seven children, 24 grandchildren, eight great-grandchildren, careers and moves. However, memories made over a lifetime together have become increasingly elusive over the past several years, since about the time Mario started to get lost driving and forget whether he likes a particular food.
At a recent memory cafe, the Cirasundas, from suburban Buffalo, and others spent the morning walking through the museum that was inspired by “I Love Lucy” star Lucille Ball in her hometown of Jamestown.
Gail kept a guiding hand on her husband’s elbow as they smiled through Johnny Carson bits from “The Tonight Show” in the center’s late night studio, browsed standup comic George Carlin’s personal notes and comedian Bob Hope artifacts, and laughed out loud at a display of classic comedy props like the banana peel and pie in the face.
During a break in the museum’s restaurant, the “Family Ties” video evoked scenes from real life.
“The moments are precious because he might not remember it,” Gail explained, “but when you’re there talking about it, you’re remembering. Five minutes later, it’s gone — but you had that moment.”
The Alzheimer’s Association estimates 7.2 million Americans over the age of 65 are living with Alzheimer’s dementia, and an even higher number of people care for an impacted friend or family member.
Memory cafes have emerged around the world in recent years as a way to connect and support individuals and caregivers, and provide information and resources. Many of the more than 600 cafes regularly running in the U.S. — often meeting in libraries and community centers — bring in speakers and engage participants with physical activity, music and art, all of which are good for the brain, experts say.
The National Comedy Center held its first one earlier this year. It seemed a natural fit after staff heard from patrons about the museum’s impact on their loved ones.
Spokesman Gary Hahn sees the center as a kind of time machine, with exhibits memorializing comedy from Vaudeville to viral memes that can transport visitors back, no matter their age. Even before the formal memory cafes began, a visitor told the center’s staff that his wife with dementia seldom spoke — but would become more verbal while walking through the museum and laughing alongside him.
“There was a stimulation of the part of the brain, whether it’s because of the nostalgia or the comedy, that had an impact on her,” said Journey Gunderson, the center’s executive director.
Shelia Kennison, an author and psychology professor at Oklahoma State University, said humor positively affects physiology in many ways.
“It takes most of your brain to process what’s being said or being shown to you and then to find the humor, and then once that happens, it sets off this cascade of brain activity and physiological changes that affects the whole body,” said Kennison, who studies how humor is involved in cognition, memory and overall wellbeing. “So it really is a whole brain workout and a whole body workout when you get that really funny joke that makes you laugh and slap your knee and rock back and forth.”
Laughter has always been important to Gail and Mario Cirasunda, whose children often gave their father Peter Sellers’ “Pink Panther” movies as gifts so they could see him laugh.
“Keep a sense of humor in your marriage,” Gail’s boss told her before she got married. Even through the challenges, she said, she’s followed the advice.
